Q's Hero

I received an anonymous email the other day informing me that the Lakeshore Fire Department had hired a new deputy chief! When I discovered who it was I was amazed. It was none other than JOHN QUENNELL!!! When I dialed his number to congratulate John I was surprised that the message on the voice mail was the voice of none other than Bob Tapak. I was startled when I heard this message: “Hello, you have reached the office of John Quennell’s spokesperson and mentor, Captain, District Chief, Assistant Chief, Real Chief and over all Grand Poobah Robert Tapak. All phone messages for Deputy Chief Quennell are now being filtered through this office for advisement. Have a great day!”

I visited Bob at his residence to investigate this strange occurrence and was surprised when Mongo answered the door. I politely asked the furry one what he was doing at Bob’s residence. He smiled at me with that strange Chewbacca smile of his and stated, “Well, Bob is now my life coach and mentor. When I heard what he did for Deputy Chief Quennell I was next in line for his services. What is so special about Bob’s services?”, I asked. A glassy-eyed look appeared over Mongo’s deep brown eyes as he spoke in an almost hero worshipping lilting voice, “Bob is simply amazing; he has had so much experience with other retired firefighters obtaining various positions after their retirement that he has become the Guru of positioning himself at the right place at exactly the right time. He is another Bill Gates as far as I’m concerned. He has just recently taught me to position myself to get ready for the day that I retire that I can become a deputy chief or even a real chief if I wanted it bad enough!”, he swooned. I could tell that Bob had read and seen the now famous book and DVD,” The Secret”. When I left Bob’s residence I saw Mongo at the computer Googling photos of Bob throughout his career. Bob had finally reached the status of hero worship with the famous chimpanzee.

On a closing note, The Windsor Star has made a valiant effort to archive all the sepia toned photographs of Chief Tapak during his 92 year career with numerous fire departments across the province. I recently saw one of him taken with none other than Thomas Edison at Menlo Park.