True Confessions

Ok, Bob Tapak gave me the idea to do this! First of all, I hate to admit that. In a recent email he pointed out that while I was poking fun at a few of you out there that maybe I should tell a few stories that I was responsible for as well. After long and careful thought I have decided to take "Bobby Bohunk's" advice and tell some stories; thus the title "True Confessions". I'll probably do this once a week until I decide whether or not to listen to Bob anymore.

The Adventure of the Fog Lights

Around 1977 or 78 Bob & I were working at #7 station. After all the humongous amount of housework and training was finished I was installing a pair of fog lights on my '76 Ford Econoline. Bob kept coming out to see how my progress was doing and he kept smiling whenever he checked out the work. I couldn't figure out why Bob kept grinning until I was finally finished. After drilling holes in the bumper for what seemed like forever I finally installed the lights, ran the wires and was really pleased with myself when I threw the light switch on and the darned things worked. I'm a genius I thought... Why pay a mechanic when you can do it yourself!!! I sprained my arm patting myself on the back and became a legend in my own mind.
It was at this very time that Bob made his final appearance and deflated my ego with one statement: "So, Lodge, how are the other drivers going to tell which way you're turning if you covered your turn signals with the fog lights?"
It's at times like those that you wish you could wind back the clock and start all over again.... When I was finally finished removing the fog lights and re drilling my van bumper resembled a seive... You could have strained vegetables through it! I developed a complex shortly after that. Everytime I saw Bob grinning at me I broke out into a cold sweat and wondered if I had messed up somewhere. Even to this day I can be walking through a grocery store and if Bob and I meet and he grins at me I retrace my steps to make sure the aisles are the same as I left them. Things are going great though, I only have two more visits left with my analyst.